Saturday, January 26, 2019

#3: Defenders of Marriage

As a society we are shifting on the ideas of what a marriage looks like. We have government officials changing laws and replacing them with new ones concerning marriage. It is easy to get distracted on what a marriage looks like in the eyes of God, especially when the popular opinion of others have convincing arguments. 

In the United States, our Supreme court voted in June 2015 to legalize marriage for same-sex couples. In the document, "Obergefell v. Hodges, 576 U.S. (2015). Supreme Court of the United States," it gives the breakdown of the majority opinion of the court as well as the dissenting opinions. The vote was split in a five to four decision reflecting the current opinions of the people in our country. 

As we look at history we see that the family is the fundamental unit of society and marriage is defined for the basis of the family unit. If our society continues to define marriage in different terms, then there is a good chance the family will break apart and our society will most likely crumble, as many societies have done before us. 

What can be done to defend marriage and the family? 

In the August 2014 Commencement address for Brigham Young University, Elder Russell M. Nelson then a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said this about our responsibility to defend marriage: 

"The greatest guardians of any and all virtues are marriage and family. This is particularly the case with the virtues of chastity and fidelity in marriage, both of which are required to create enduring and fully rewarding marriage partnerships and family relationships."

Wow, the "greatest of all virtues are guardians of marriage and family," (Nelson, 2014). What a responsibility!. We cannot be afraid and we cannot let the opinions of others stop us from defending marriage between a man and a woman. 

In "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" states: "THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan" (1995). This proclamation was written by the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. At the end of the document they give us further call to action: "WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society" (1995).  


It is time to start defending marriage and protecting the rights and laws for marriage between a man and a woman. It will be hard, especially as more people accept the differing definitions of marriage, however, our society depends on it. What are some ways you can get involved in your communities to defend marriage? Our world needs good guardians who will protect the rights and privileges that come from marriage and family. What will you do to make a difference? 




Friday, January 18, 2019

#2: About 40% of Marriages End in Divorce...Will Yours Be One of Them?

So many people threaten divorce when things in a marriage get rough. If things go unresolved, almost half of all Americans do get a divorce. What can be done to stop it?

Dallin H. Oaks from the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gives this advice: 

"I strongly urge you and those who advise you to face up to the reality that for most marriage problems, the remedy is not divorce but repentance. Often the cause is not incompatibility but selfishness. The first step is not separation but reformation. Divorce is not an all-purpose solution, and it often creates long-term heartache" (2007). 

We are a society where we are focused on quick solutions and a divorce is a quick solution, but at what cost? Could there be hope for people thinking about getting a divorce? What if they followed the council given by Elder Dallin H. Oaks? Could things be reversed if people started looking outwardly at their spouse instead of inwardly? One time my husband and I were fighting over some things and we were so angry with each other. Both of us were ready to walk out on each other. It was horrible. As I was fuming in my anger, something told me to write the things down I liked about my husband. I sat for a few more minutes debating with myself why I should do such a thing, but then I started making a list. From the first line item, I started feeling a little better, as I got to five things, my heart started softening and I started feeling better. By the time I listed twenty things, I was calm and ready to talk to my husband. When I went in to talk to him, I handed my list to him and as he was reading it his heart was immediately softened and we were able to work things out. 

I know that there are some circumstances in life where divorce is inevitable, where there have been serious abuses and pain so severe you cannot recover, but under circumstances where you think things can get better, try reaching out unselfishly and looking at how you are adding to the problems and start thinking of ways to do better. 

The best advice is doing things together. Help each other heal and forgive one another. Pray together. Praying together will bring you closer to God and each other. Things can get better as you take divorce off the table if you are willing to work with each other. 


#13 Relationships with Extended Family

Getting married brings a whole new dynamic in extended family relationships. Sometimes it can be complicated as you try and meet the ex...